So, you’ve picked out your first cigar, mastered the art of cutting and lighting, and now you know some common mistakes to avoid. As we discussed in a previous article, smoking cigars is all about enjoying the experience. Whether you’re sitting in a cigar lounge or smoking at a social gathering, there are some unspoken rules that can help elevate the experience for you and those around you. Knowing a bit of cigar and lounge etiquette can make a huge difference and keep you from making rookie mistakes. Let’s dive into the key principles that will help you blend in and enjoy your time like a seasoned aficionado.
1. Respect the Space and Others Around You
Cigars produce a lot of smoke—that’s part of the charm—but not everyone enjoys the smoke to the same degree. While you may love the aroma, others might not, and in mixed company, it’s courteous to keep an eye on where your smoke is drifting. This is especially true if you’re in a group where not everyone is smoking.
In a lounge: You walk into a cigar lounge, you have to assume there will be cigar smoking going on. So, this might never be an issue, but… If you’re in a group with both smokers and non-smokers, the general rule is that smokers tend to sit together on one side, with non-smokers on the other. Try to position yourself in such a way that your smoke doesn’t blow directly into someone else’s face, especially if they seem uncomfortable with it. Just like a campfire, the smoke seems to drift towards the person most averse to it. Be mindful if your smoke is effecting someone else and if it’s an easy fix than try to prevent it.
2. Take Your Time: Cigar Smoking Is a Ritual
Cigar smoking isn’t a quick activity—it’s a leisurely, contemplative ritual. One of the biggest mistakes beginners make is rushing through their cigar. There’s no need to puff too frequently or finish it quickly.
Focus on your surroundings: This isn’t just about slowing down with your cigar—it’s about the whole experience. Disconnect from electronics and engage with the people around you. Lounges are often social places, meant for good conversation and connection. Take the opportunity to talk with your fellow smokers between puffs.
3. Don’t Double-Dip: Cutting and Lighting Your Cigar
As we discussed in a previous article, cutting your cigar properly is essential. Here’s a quick etiquette tip—if you’re using a communal cutter, don’t use it after you’ve already placed the cigar in your mouth. That’s the cigar equivalent of double-dipping, it’s like putting your whole mouth on the cutter! It’s also still somewhat common for people to lick their cigar before cutting. This habit stems from a time when cigars weren’t always properly humidified. If you have your own cutter, feel free to lick the cigar, but be cautious if you’re using a communal cutter that others will use after you.
Pro Tips: If you’re ever worried that someone may have "double-dipped" with a communal cutter, it’s completely acceptable to bring your own. In fact, it’s a great idea to bring your own cutter and lighter to a lounge, and we have plenty of options for sale at Paul’s if you need one. Some people like to cut their cigar, test the draw, then recut if needed. If you want to do this most cigars you can draw through from the opposite end to test the airflow, then when you cut a little deeper it’s not touching where your mouth touched.
4. Ashing Your Cigar Like a Pro
The ash on your cigar isn’t something to flick away like a cigarette. Letting the ash build up to about an inch helps regulate the burn and keeps the cigar cool. Timing when to ash can be tricky, but here’s a good rule: when it’s ready, it will come off easily. Put your cigar on the edge of the ashtray and roll it along the edge, it will fall off if ready.
Use of the ashtray: Try to ash in the tray whenever possible, and stick to using one ashtray for the duration of your smoke. It’s a courtesy to keep things tidy and contained. If the ash misses the tray, don’t stress about it—every smoker has misjudged the timing now and again. It’s the thought and effort that count.
5. Observe And Ask
Lounge etiquette can be as simple as observing how regulars and staff act in the space. From how they handle their cigars to how they interact with others, you can learn a lot by watching. If you’re ever unsure about something—whether it’s where to sit, how to cut your cigar, or when to ash—just ask. Cigar lounges are usually full of friendly folks who are more than happy to help newcomers.
6. The Cigar Band: To Remove or Not to Remove?
Removing the cigar band is more of a personal choice, but it’s still worth discussing. Some smokers like to remove the band before lighting up, while others wait until the cigar burns close to the band before taking it off.
The Etiquette: There’s no strict rule here, but if you wait until the cigar burns near the band, the heat will loosen the paste that holds the band on, making it easier to remove without damaging the cigar. One thing to avoid is smoking through the band—paper and ink don’t taste as good as tobacco!
Pro Tip: In some countries outside of the U.S., it’s considered bad form to leave the band on, as it can seem like you’re showing off the brand of cigar. Something to keep in mind if you travel abroad, but again, there should be other smokers there to take your cue from.
7. Respect the Lounge Rules
Every lounge is a bit different. Some may allow outside cigars, while others ask that you only smoke what you buy there. Some serve alcohol, others don’t or are bring your own. Pay attention to the house rules and ask if you don’t know.
8. Cleanup and Courtesy
When you’re finished with your cigar, let it rest in the ashtray to go out naturally. Unlike cigarettes, cigars aren’t meant to be stubbed out, as this can release a strong, unpleasant odor and make the ashtray harder to clean. Simply place it down in the ashtray when you’re done and allow it to extinguish itself. If you’re smoking at a lounge with staff, you can reasonably expect that they’ll take care of everything. But still try not to leave them with a big mess.
9. Mind Your Noise Level
There’s no clear-cut rule here. Just match the tone and level of the people around you. If you’re at a place and people are watching the game, cheering and hollering, it’s on you to bring headphones if you want peace and quiet. If everyone around you seems to be enjoying an atmosphere of quiet conversation, then don’t disturb that. In general, the people in your group should be able to hear you, not the people across the room. This is especially important you’re your phone. Whether watching the game with a rowdy crowd or sitting among people who view cigar smoking as meditation, no one wants to hear constant noise from your phone.
10. Handling the Cigar Before Purchase
Once you buy a cigar, you can do whatever you like with it, but before purchasing, please be mindful of how you handle it. Avoid putting cigars up to your nose or squeezing them. You won’t be able to tell much that way, and it could damage the cigar. If you’re looking at flavored cigars, you can often get a good sense of the flavor by smelling the box from a distance without picking up individual cigars.
Purchasing: Once you pick out a cigar, hand it to the staff before opening the plastic wrapper so they can easily scan it. It’s a small courtesy that helps things move smoothly.
11. Everyone in a Cigar Lounge Is a Friend—But Don’t Be Intrusive
Cigar lounges are a great place to meet new people who share at least one thing in common—an appreciation for cigars. Feel free to strike up conversations with people you don’t know but be mindful of the situation. Some people are there to enjoy quiet time with their thoughts, and others may be deep in conversation with their group. It’s important to read the room.
Pro Tip: It’s always polite to ask for or offer help but be careful about coming off as a "know-it-all." Everyone has their own way of enjoying cigars, and the last thing you want to do is criticize someone else’s method of relaxing.
Final Thoughts: The World of Cigar Etiquette
Understanding cigar and lounge etiquette is an important part of enhancing your smoking experience, whether you're with friends or an unfamiliar lounge. The world of cigars is meant to be enjoyed slowly, with good company, good conversation, and refined relaxation. The more you embrace the rituals and respect the space, the more rewarding the experience will be. As I’ve repeatedly said in this article, be mindful. That is what cigar smoking is all about taking time out of your busy schedule and being mindful of the world around you.
Do you have a cigar pet peeve that I skipped over? Let me know in the comments.